The Petal of the Rose Page 2

  I thought I'd lost my mind as I read Kaleipus's words; either that or the centaur had lost command of his own faculties. Oh, Kaleipus... no, no, no... I read on, trying to avoid letting my growing fear and agitation seep through to my face as any kind of an expression Solan might decipher.

  Greetings, Lord Conqueror.

  Xena, my friend, for after all this time I feel that you are a friend indeed, the time has come for me to ask of you what you asked of me so long ago. Solan has come to a point in his life where he has learned all that I might teach him. To rule the Centaur Nation is certainly within his right as my adopted heir, but as always, that hinges somewhat on your decisions in regards to the boy.

  Xena, Solan is your son, and, try as we both will, nothing can change that. He becomes more and more like you everyday. This, in part, fuels my decision. As to whether you ever decide to tell Solan that you are his mother, I will leave it in your hands. Know only that I will support any decision that you make. Your heart has always erred toward the side of good where Solan was involved. My concern is that he has turned into a young man who commands, never asks. He expects, where he should receive gratefully. I have no explanation for his behavior and wonder if it isn't something inherent. Between you and me, old friend, he has become an arrogant prig!

  I ask that you allow Solan to live with you for a time, learning what he can from someone I consider to be not only the greatest warrior I have ever fought alongside, but also a ruler who can be proud of what she has accomplished for her homeland.

  You have changed much over these last few seasons, Xena, all for the better. I think Solan could do much worse than to emulate you. My wish is that you might sometime reveal your true identity to him, but that is for you to decide. I would ask only that you teach him by example, show him that people can change.

  Your friend & warrior always,

  Kaleipus

  "Do you know what the scroll contains?" I looked up and asked.

  "I was not privy to it, no, Lord Conqueror."

  "But, you have an inkling. You must have been told something regarding your trip here."

  "Kaleipus told me of his desire for me to learn how to become a better ruler," he smirked. "I took that to mean he thought I might be able to learn a few things from you."

  "I take it you feel you need no instruction in this area," I commented.

  He shrugged his shoulders. "No disrespect intended, Conqueror, but if you are placed in charge, the people are forced to obey you."

  "And you see no problem with this?"

  "None that can't be put down at the end of a sword," he responded.

  Gods, Kaleipus what have you done to me!

  "Perhaps I see what Kaleipus wishes that you learn. Solan, there are two kinds of complicity in regards to a ruler's subjects. They will obey out of fear or they will obey out of respect."

  I rose and walked across the room, turning my back on the young man, knowing I just made the decision I probably should have discussed with Gabrielle first. I continued to gaze out the window into the sunny courtyard, smiling at the children who no longer felt fearful about playing in front of the castle.

  "Make no mistake about it, people who are forced to comply with a ruler's wishes and demands, at the point of a soldier's blade, do not respect you. Their obedience is simply a fearful acknowledgement that your strength is greater than theirs is. Trust me, I learned that lesson the hard way." I finished, speaking almost to myself.

  "I do agree with Kaleipus, however," Solan admitted. "I welcome the chance to study under your tutelage, Lord Conqueror."

  "Is that so?" I turned and arched an eyebrow in his direction.

  "Absolutely. If nothing else, I welcome the opportunity to test my fighting ability against the greatest warrior the Greek Empire has ever known."

  His hand unconsciously rested upon the hilt of his sword. I believe he sought to flatter me, but he couldn't hide the presumptuous tone from his voice. His intent was clear. He wished to test himself against my ability, not learn from me. His words told me he thought he was already as good as I. I guarantee you, my son; your eyes haven't seen what mine have.

  "And you think you're up to that challenge, do you?" I asked, my smile indicating it was a rhetorical question.

  His eyes glanced quickly down to the sword on my hip. The morning sun shone through the open-air windows and gleamed brightly off the ornately fashioned Lion's head on the hilt. His glance was quick, but I saw the envy in his eyes before he had time to draw his gaze away again. Now I had only to figure out if he was willing to back up that coveting look with hard work. Many men looked at my symbol, the Lion of Amphipolis, and wished it for their own. Most possessed only envy. I wondered if Solan was willing to make the crucial sacrifices, mainly the effort necessary, to attain it.

  "Very well then, young pup," I said aloud, much to Solan's displeasure. "I shall send a letter to Kaleipus and explain that you will be staying here in Corinth, but make no mistake, I am a hard mentor. I will expect you to do exactly what I say, when I say it. You are not to interfere or voice your opinions unless asked for. You are simply to listen, watch, and obey. Agreed?"

  It was obvious he was warring with himself over the answer. I silently applauded as his desire to learn from the woman known to him only as the Conqueror, took precedence over his proud and unbending nature.

  "Agreed," he said between clenched teeth.

  I chuckled and turned away from him. "Try not to make it sound as if you're being condemned." I at least got a little smile out of him this time.

  "Gabrielle will be here shortly, I'd like you to meet the lady of the castle," I said, unsure of how much detail to go into upon their first meeting.

  "Ahh, yes," he answered. "I heard that you have a concubine sharing your bed. And most talented in that arena I heard, too," he grinned.

  I turned to face him and I could tell by the way he swallowed and his faced paled slightly that he noticed the expression on my face. It was apparent he was just realizing he's made some dreadful mistake, and he had. I walked up to him slowly and to his credit, he only backed up a half a step.

  "I will say this once, Solan, and only once, and if you forget it, I'm sure your mind can imagine what I will do to a man if I have to say it a second time. Gabrielle is a lady, free born. She is my Consort and, after our marriage, will be Queen of the Greek Empire. She is to be treated with the utmost respect. She possesses a dignity and grace, something she has managed to keep after all she has suffered, that the likes of you and I shall never realize. Have I made myself clear?"

  He nodded for a few heartbeats, until he could find his voice, I'm sure. The matter proved that I had a long road ahead of me, for my first instinct was to loose the beast I felt clawing at my belly, and beat the stuffing out of the insolent boy. The voice I heard next, however, suddenly caused the monster in me to dissipate into nothingness.

  "My Lord?"

  I turned to find Gabrielle, looking lovely, as I knew she would. She was nervous and afraid of this meeting, and I could see it in her eyes. She held herself like the Queen she would soon be, however. I smiled at her, a natural reaction when she came into view, and I saw some of the tension leave her body. I took a deep breath, walked over to her, and kissed her lightly on the cheek.

  "Gabrielle," I took her hand, but stood where we were. "May I introduce Solan, an emissary from the Centaur Nation. He will be staying in our home for a time, with your permission, of course."

  I turned and bowed my head slightly to her, a smile on my face. Gabrielle looked as flustered as Solan, but for a different reason. She fielded my query with her customary grace and returned the teasing smile.

  "Of course," she repeated.

  Gabrielle tried to move her body forward to greet the young man, who, in truth, was two summers older than she was, but I held her in place with an unseen squeeze of her hand. Solan quickly realized what was expected and nearly tripped over himself in order to step up to the small woman. He not
only bowed this time, but also took the hand Gabrielle offered and raised it to his lips for a well-mannered kiss.

  "Lady Gabrielle," he said.

  "It would be a pleasure to have you stay with us, Solan."

  I could see the two of them, examining one another while trying to appear as though they were not. It was like looking into a mirror, watching Solan, and I wondered how many other traits, beyond the physical, could be inherent. Gabrielle... well, I simply knew what she was thinking most of the time because it was as if she had become an extension of myself. I can explain it no better than that. What I couldn't ascertain was what they were thinking about one another. My best guess was that Gabrielle was naturally curious about the young man I called my son. I wondered if she saw the similarities between the boy and me as readily as I did.

  Solan was another matter. Although I was an excellent student of human nature and the behavior of men, I had no way of knowing what he was thinking at that moment. I did remember, however, the condescending, almost leering, tone in his voice when he initially called Gabrielle my concubine. I wondered again how many of my appetites the boy acquired through blood alone. Unfortunately, my impression of Solan was that he thought himself superior to those around him.

  I listened as he and Gabrielle exchanged a few pleasantries. It was obvious to me that he looked down on her and I simply hoped that Gabrielle didn't pick up the same feeling. Part of me didn't want to see the woman I love suffer any hurt, physical or emotional. There was a part of me that was humiliated. I spent so much time trying to protect Gabrielle from the person I used to be, thanking Athena daily for waiting until this point in my life to bring Gabrielle into it. After all that, here was my child, using the same callous and unfeeling manners that I used to possess.

  "Perhaps a special dinner, in honor of Solan? Xena?"

  "Yes... yes, a very good idea," I squeezed Gabrielle's hand. I just now realized I had been holding on to it all this time. Perhaps I needed strength just as she did. "I think Delia would love the excuse to prepare us a feast."

  "Shall I arrange it, then?" she asked.

  I smiled broadly. My future bride was quite an actress, but then again, the life she led before we met required it. This was the first time Gabrielle and I really worked as a team, welcoming someone. I'm sure she was still wondering what she was supposed to do, as the Lady of this palace, and what would be considered overstepping her sudden and newfound authority.

  "Absolutely," I answered. "If you will speak to Delia, I'll give Solan a small tour of the palace and arrange for his rooms."

  Just like that, our first meeting was over and none of us keeled over in death. It may have been strained, but not altogether unpleasant. Gabrielle gained a bit of confidence, I kept my temper from controlling me, and Solan, well, Solan was a young man with a lot of habits and ways I had every intention of removing, if I could. There was something more in his eyes, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It was the way in which he looked at me. There was more there, lying just beneath the surface, but it could have been my own unease at looking into eyes the color of my own. Whatever the reason, I couldn't shake the feeling that Solan harbored a secret of his own.

  CHAPTER 2

  "WHETHER BY ACCIDENT OR DESTINY"

  I STOOD SILENTLY IN the corridor remembering the last time I had been looking for Gabrielle here. It was the very first day she arrived in my palace and I had to go searching for her myself. I shook my head, the emotions I was feeling on that day coming back to me. Thinking my then slave had let herself be wooed by another, my anger stole my reason. I remember thinking that I would kill Gabrielle if I found her in the arms of another. Gods, it's been only a matter of moons, yet it feels as if that day were ages past. Have I really fallen in love and made something different of myself in this short a time? Am I the person who beat, killed, and maimed for sport? Xena the Conqueror… was that woman truly I?

  As it turned out, today I found Gabrielle seated in much the same place as when I found her back then, beside a fireplace in Delia's kitchen. She looked even younger than her years, sitting on a stool, her hands placed idly in her lap. Her golden hair hung loose about her shoulders and her green eyes looked like bits of molten amber as they reflected the flames from the fire before her.

  I knew it was wrong, to eavesdrop in such a way. Well, it seems I have not become the perfect woman overnight, for I couldn't resist. Gabrielle and I spoke, but forthrightness was something we both would need to work at. I was always careful of revealing too much and, like Gabrielle, simply didn't know how. That is to say, living the life of a slave for the last ten summers caused speechlessness to become habit for my young lover. My excuse was a little more complicated, well, perhaps not complicated at all. It was rather simple after all. I was terrified, that is the only reason for it.

  I remember a day when all I feared was that someone stronger than myself might someday come along and take what was mine. Now, especially now that I have Gabrielle, I fear so much. My terrors, should I name them all, would be greater in number than the stars in the night sky. Therefore, I say all this in a completely pathetic attempt at justifying my next actions. I slipped behind a wall of barrels full of honeyed mead and proceeded to watch and listen to all that my future wife and cook said.

  "Are you sure it's no imposition, Delia?" Gabrielle asked.

  "Of course not, child. There is nothing I like better than planning a good party!" the older woman exclaimed with a wink. "So, tell me, why all the fuss for this young man?"

  "Because he's--" Gabrielle stopped abruptly. "Well, because he is a dignitary from the Centaur Nation."

  Gabrielle lowered her head quickly, so quickly, in fact, that she missed the tiny smile that pulled at the corners of the older woman's lips. I could tell that Delia knew Gabrielle well enough to see the young woman was hiding something about the boy's identity. I wondered, with a smile, how long it would take my lover to admit the truth. I would honestly harbor no ill will toward Gabrielle for giving the information up to Delia. This old woman knew more about me than even my Captain, Atrius did. Besides, Delia was smarter than most, I didn't think it would take her long to catch on. I had no fear that those who knew me for a woman and a person, might come to the conclusion that Solan was indeed my son, but also that those who knew me simply as the Conqueror would never guess this rumor to be fact.

  "Admit it, Gabrielle, he's more than that. Isn't he?" Delia prodded.

  Gabrielle looked up at the cook, concerned written across her face. "I can't say, Delia. Please don't ask me again."

  That comment surprised me. I began to see at that moment that although appearing quite honest and innocent, Gabrielle was in truth a young woman capable of stilling her tongue when necessary. A feeling not unlike pride came over me, thinking of a future with a partner in whom I could well and truly trust.

  Delia looked at Gabrielle intently for a moment, I'm sure catching the serious expression on Gabrielle's features and the pleading tone in her voice.

  "All right, dear. He's rather good looking, though. I saw him in the courtyard this morning. Tall, strong, piercing blue eyes… why of I didn't know better I might be tempted to say he was--"

  Gods that woman is good! I watched as Delia and Gabrielle both raised their heads to stare at one another. Some unspoken communication must have been passed, for by the time I blinked, they each turned their heads, lost in their own thoughts. I swear by Hades, it must have been one of those woman things. Perhaps it was the kind of odd telepathy that women seem to have the ability to share, but in which I have always been lacking. Too much of the warrior in me I suspect.

  "I see… how very… intriguing," Delia said, obviously caught by her own lack of response. She stood there, pensive and seemingly lost in thought for a few heartbeats before returning to her chopping table. "It fits, I must say. It rather seems like something she would do," Delia finished saying with a confident nod of her head.

  Gabrielle said nothing during my fr
iend's apparently private musing. The young blonde turned in her seat toward the table, which, as fortune would have it, faced in my direction. Gabrielle pulled a bowl closer to her and absently began shelling peas.

  "So, what do you think of this young man?" Delia asked.

  "Oh, Delia, he's a selfish, spoiled brat!" Gabrielle blurted out.

  I practically had to put a hand over my mouth to prevent a burst of sudden laughter from escaping my lips. My young lover was extremely perceptive and I was glad to see that her discernment of people hadn't waned any in the time she'd been with me. Delia laughed loudly, covering any noise I may have made.

  "Well, he certainly seems to be his mother's child then, doesn't he?"

  "But she changed…" Gabrielle's face instantly turned serious.

  Delia smiled at the young woman. "You love her very much, don't you, Gabrielle?"

  If I live to be a thousand, I think I shall never forget the look on her face at that moment. The look of complete and utter love and devotion that shone forth from Gabrielle's eyes caused my heart to constrict tightly within my chest.

  "Yes, I do. I never would have thought it possible to feel this way, that I could feel this way about anyone, let alone the Conqueror of the Known World."

  "I'm sure Xena feels the same sense of awe that you're feeling."

  "Do you really think so, Delia?" Gabrielle turned her head quickly to look at the older woman.

  "Do you have any doubt?" Delia sounded rather incredulous.

  "Well… I… no, but…"

  "From the sounds than emanate from your rooms at all times of the day and night, I should think not!" Delia replied flippantly.

  Gabrielle quickly lowered her head to stare at the table, her cheeks turning pink. As I have done on other occasions, I watched as the delicate flush to her cheeks spread. I am always dumbfounded that a woman who has spent half her life pleasing men and women with her body could blush at the mere mention of what she and I do in our bedchamber. I suppose, it is simply one of the many charms that endears Gabrielle to me.